Precipice

December 31st. A countdown to a new year's beginning. New goals and resolutions for the next 365 days. New calendars. New hopes.

A fresh start.

I know we each have various new beginnings in our lives which have nothing to do with the date. I am so grateful to have had those in my own life this last year, however difficult they have been.

I know Thanksgiving has passed, but I would like to continue in the spirit of gratitude and acknowledge a few more things I am deeply grateful for.

Faith. & not just any faith, but the specific faith I have the priviledge of holding in my heart this very day & hour. I am not afraid of my future, even the difficult parts which no doubt will continue to come. I know that I am loved. That I am cared for. That I belong. & for all of you who know even the smallest portion of my life and the underlying struggles which have vexed this heart of mine for many years, I know you will understand the miracle of those 3 new truths I have gained.
Change. Were it not for change, there would be no growth. Stagnancy would be our past, present, and future. Change keeps us on our toes as I'm sure my grandmother would say. It keeps us in motion; alert, strong, and capable. & I am not only grateful for the uncontrollable changes which we must adapt and respond to, but I am grateful for the power we each have within ourselves to make a change. To change outside things, or change ourselves inwardly. I am grateful for the element and ability of change.
Trust. While I know there should be a deep trust issue resounding in my heart, I find it beautifully ironic that the reason I don't is because I, myself, am trustworthy. And also that I still genuinely exercise trust. I trust in a God who is so perfect, so loving, and so good, that there is no room to question whether the universe holds goodness and light ahead for each of us. It absolutely does.
Trials of Faith. This is really just an extension of Change. But there is something specific here which is different. First of all, anyone can go through change. But in order to go through a trial of faith, one must first possess Faith. Faith in anything. But faith must be present. And this trial is a priceless opportunity to strengthen your faith, which in itself is a priceless gift. An opportunity to deepen and increase value on something already dear and precious and priceless to us. The opportunities are unique. Rare. And should be properly respected. No two trials will give the same results. They will strengthen different areas, refine different characteristics, bring unique understandings, perspectives, beauties, and joys. But, like snowflakes, you will never find two which will be exactly the same, or yield the same specific gifts. They are bonus rounds with so much to be gained. And once you have the right perspective, understanding, and strategy, they can even be celebrated. Not for the pain, heartaches, and grief involved, but for sweet, sweet blessings which are yours to be had for the experiencing, which will never, ever leave your heart and foundational testimony. I love the way Paul in the New Testament states:

My strength is perfect in weakness. Most glady therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.
(2 Corinthians 12:9-10)


A New Year.

I am so honored to be where I am today, and to have 2007 ahead of me, perfect in the beauty of it being whatever I choose to make of it for myself. I am honored to be a member of a family who loves me, deeper than I know. And to have friends and influences who become my extended family and who also love me more than I know.
And I am honored to have a heart which was born to love, and to feel.

Thank you to each of you who have been a part of my life and heart this last year. May the New Year bring great joys and blessings to each of your hearts and lives!
God bless you!! (every one!) : )